It's FEAR!
Take a risk, take a leap, make your life fully yours! Learn like you were to live forever, live like you were to die tomorrow.
The situations we find ourselves in can be chaotic, they can be confusing. But when we find ourselves in turmoil, we must, we MUST make a change. Whether it's focusing on ourselves and making that change within, or completely stirring up our routines, it MUST be done.
A lot of people that I know who have been through divorce say, "the other person wanted me to change, and I'm not changing for anyone." Sounds selfish, but it's not, because we all change. Our partners just need to realize from the BEGINNING that the person we commit our lives to, is going to change. It's ignorant to think that we will be EXACTLY the same as we were when we were 24, 25, or 31 for that matter! I don't expect to be the same in 20 years, hell, I may even become a Republican! GOD FORBID! If I was still that same girl I was when I was at 26 years old, I may as well just shoot myself now. I am so much more comfortable with who I am, and most importantly, I know I don't have to answer to anyone, but myself. I am ultimately in charge of my happiness. If I eventually share my life with somebody, I want to make sure that whoever it is, can realize that change is good, it is possible, and it cannot be forced. I want that person to accept me for who I am, and accept the change as I go. Being that I accept change in myself, I know that I will be able to accept change in others. I will be able to be supportive and understanding.
Life is FAR too short to leave in fear. We are all afraid of the unknown, but we continue to go to sleep at night feeling pretty secure about the next day. We are willing to live in pain and suffering because we want to cling to something familiar, because we're afraid of what we may lose. I said this the other day to somebody, if we end up with nothing when we make the step towards righting our live,s we then have EVERYTHING to gain.
You only get one chance at this life. We should be willing to admit that we've made mistakes and no matter how terrifying rectifying it may be, we must have the courage to do so.
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We fight it but cannot change it - impermanence. The impermanence and transitory nature of all things, people, places, ideas and emotions. It seems that the suffering people feel when faced with the changes you describe is due to our attachment to our perceptions of what's real, which makes us forget over and over every day that nothing in the universe is permanent.
ReplyDeleteYou are insightful. So, what do we do? Continue to wallow in our suffering? Or do we change it because we know it is just perception? I say go for change. I'm getting kind of used to it myself. My life seems transitory. It's not that I am transitory, but the people that come in and out of my life are.
ReplyDeleteWe simply do what we feel is right. Wallowing in suffering is of course problematic, although it is often comfortable and familiar. Getting used to seeing the impermanence around you is a good thing. Many people see that as being cold, but it is really quite the opposite as you embrace the true nature of all things.
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