Joe

I saw this picture on FB today. Made me cry a little.  :(

Lovey Dovey Day on the Way... ICK!

Okay, so I am a victim of the VH-1's show Tough Love.  I don't watch it regularly, but sometimes I indulge myself  The basic concept of the show is to bring about ten girls together and show them what they are doing wrong when it comes to dating and attracting men.  Seems kind of like cruel and unusual punishment to put oneself through, but there are some deep psychological issues that are touched on.  The last episode I saw resonated with me.  The girls met three women over the age of sixty who had never been married and had made terrible mistakes during their "dating" years.

This will be my 31st year as a single girl on Valentine's Day.  Many people will write off V-Day as cliche and say they don't celebrate it.  I call bullshit on all of you coupled people that say that.  My best friend and her ex-boyfriend, would claim that they didn't do anything, and thought it was stupid. HOWEVER, they ALWAYS got something for each other and hung out together and were super mushy towards each other. So, BS, BS, BS!!!!

I'm beginning to think that I will be that sixty year old woman who has never found love because I tend to fuck up every relationship I have been in.  It's not even screwing up the ones I'm in, it's the type of man that I gravitate to. The emotionally unavailable, the completely unavailable, or the wrong personality. And the worst part, is that I don't seem to make connections with many men.  After every disappointment I turn to my very good friend Mark and try to figure out what I've done wrong this time.  Why aren't these men attracted to me?  I'm pretty nice looking, I'm friendly, I am pretty smart, I have a sense of humor, I LIKE STAR WARS, and good music. So what's the problem?  Here's the answer I get from everyone: It'll happen when it's supposed to happen. But those women on Tough Love made me think, it really might NOT happen.  And you know what? I'm okay with it because I am happy.  I'm not willing to just settle for mediocrity.  I know myself, and if I am going to have a life partner, then I need to make sure that person compliments me well.  I would love to welcome someone into my life to share it with, but I have to make sure that person is up for complimenting each other rather than just making the other happy.  My goal is to go beyond the look of someone, (which I have done as I've tended to date a variety of different "looks," when it comes to the face, I don't discriminate) to look into the soul and mind of that person, and somebody that can do the same with me.  We must embrace each other's minds above anything else.

So this Valentine's Day I celebrate the love I have towards myself, all the hard work I've put into making myself happy.  If someone would like to enhance my life, and I theirs, then I welcome it.  Gassho!

Peace friends!

A Set Up for Failure

Sorry if you didn't read this one.  It was temporary!


I have worked at my job for the past four years and I must say, like any job it has it's ups and downs. I have a co-worker who has been with the company for ten years, and the management team (at least some of them) in the past year, have made his life at work, simply put, hell. Every week a new obstacle was put before him, obstacles that everyone knew he would not be able to achieve. They were put there so that he would fail.

Well, fail is what he did and I feel for him. He called me a few weeks ago and told me that he didn't feel like fighting it anymore because the whole situation just made him too stressed. He talked with his doctor and came to the conclusion that the person creating these problems was extremely toxic. And that manager is indeed toxic. It is horrible to feel like you must tiptoe around people. I'm a highly positive person, but even this person's disposition towards everything is contagious. Luckily I am more capable of performing my job functions than my co-worker is.

That being said, when I see him at work now, I see how much happier he is. Most people would have cried defeat and started looking for new employment. But not him; ten years is a huge dedication to ONE place of employment. I commend him for not giving up. In fact, I think he will do so much more marvelously in his new position. I have seen him really step up to the plate and take ownership of his duties. Before he was always moping around and trying to not make any mistakes. But now, he is on top of it. What gets me though is to see his former boss still wishing for his failure. Everyday it is, "I have to clean up all his mistakes, and he'll screw up his new job sooner or later." What gets me even more is how this person can say, "I like him, I don't want him to do bad," when the complete opposite comes out of his/her mouth. The last few weeks I have needed to keep my mind focused on work and keep myself busy, but this kind of focus is not something I need either. So, I have been customer oriented this week... FO SHO!!!

I am so proud of him for taking a difficult situation and turning it into something good. If only we could all do the same in our real life situations, not just in our jobs.

Sometimes we just have to step back, take note, and make the changes that will bring about a positive outcome. Like I said, it is so nice to not seem him nervous anymore. I wrote him a letter today to let him know that I think he is a strong and that I think it is honorable and exemplifying what he has been able to do.

Peace friends... all four of my followers!