I am not a believer of spiritual warfare for the most part. I believe that God is always at work. That also means I believe the tempter is also at work, trying to prevent God's work from happening. The tempter loves to distract us and pull our attention away from God.
During the month of January, I filled my soul regularly by connecting with God through prayer and Scripture. Today I sat down at my desk to take up my Psalm practice and realized that the last time I actually sat down for a purposeful time with God was on January 17, 2019. Surely that was a mistake - but the date I wrote down does not lie!
Spiritual warfare.
As I reflect on this last month, I can see where I have been doing things in order to get people to come to my church. I want to extend the love of God, but I haven't been connecting with God. How will anyone come to my church if I can't take the time to let God fill me up.
I join with the Psalmist who says in Psalm 107: 4-5
some wandered in the desert wastes, finding no way to an inhabited town,
hungry and thirsty, their soul fainted within them.
Yes, my soul has fainted within me.
I want all to know God, but not at the cost of my desperate hunger and thirst.
Luckily I know that even when I am far from God, I am still in the midst of God.
The Psalmist reminds us in the next verses (6-7):
They they cried to the Lord in their trouble
and God delivered them from their distress;
the Lord led them by a straight way,
until they reached an inhabited town.
My to-do list is long, but I take this time to let my God feed my soul.
Monday, February 18, 2019
Friday, February 8, 2019
. . . does faith always heal us . . .
There is this really famous story in the synoptic gospels (Mark, Matthew & Luke) about a woman who had been hemorrhaging for twelve years. Aka she had her period for twelve years straight. In the ancient Jewish tradition, she would have been considered unclean - an untouchable. She was an outcast in her community. I can imagine her desperation and resolve when she heard that Jesus was passing through her town. She found the courage to go into the crowd to get a glimpse, to possibly touch him. She knew that doing so would heal her.
In the middle of that crowd, Jesus felt the power go out of him when she reached out and touched the fringe of his garment... he asked, "who touched me?" Nervously she explained what happened. And Jesus cared for her and confirmed, "daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace." (Luke 8:42-48 is one reading of this)
If it was only that easy for us today, 2000 years removed from when Jesus walked the earth. If only we could reach out and touch his cloak and be healed. I know the Holy Spirit is with us and it is easy to reach out to the heart of God, but sometimes our faith doesn't heal us. Our bodies aren't meant to last, but we want so desperately for God to heal us just like Jesus did that day two millennia ago.
Dave's surgery could not be completed today. The doctors found the mass in his pancreas to be twice the size the scan showed. They had to close him back up and will start chemo in two to three weeks.
As I left St. Luke's today I made sure to stop by the chapel to pray and to update our database at church. On the altar was a cross, but the mosaic on the wall showed the story of the hemorrhaging woman with Jesus (without the crowd). It says at the bottom, "great is your faith, be it as you desire."
When we receive news like the news above, we wonder and cry out to God, "isn't our faith great enough? This isn't what we desired!"
This story always brings me hope, but now my heart grieves. Rosemary, Dave and their daughters won't lose faith today because of this news. They will struggle to make sense of it and discern next steps. As for me, I'll remember what I've always believed, God answers prayers in ways that only God understands. Our minds cannot grasp the concept of the ways in which God works. All we can really do is know that God's intentions for us are greater than we have the capability to understand.
Lord, in your mercy... hear our prayers.
In the middle of that crowd, Jesus felt the power go out of him when she reached out and touched the fringe of his garment... he asked, "who touched me?" Nervously she explained what happened. And Jesus cared for her and confirmed, "daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace." (Luke 8:42-48 is one reading of this)
If it was only that easy for us today, 2000 years removed from when Jesus walked the earth. If only we could reach out and touch his cloak and be healed. I know the Holy Spirit is with us and it is easy to reach out to the heart of God, but sometimes our faith doesn't heal us. Our bodies aren't meant to last, but we want so desperately for God to heal us just like Jesus did that day two millennia ago.
Dave's surgery could not be completed today. The doctors found the mass in his pancreas to be twice the size the scan showed. They had to close him back up and will start chemo in two to three weeks.
As I left St. Luke's today I made sure to stop by the chapel to pray and to update our database at church. On the altar was a cross, but the mosaic on the wall showed the story of the hemorrhaging woman with Jesus (without the crowd). It says at the bottom, "great is your faith, be it as you desire."When we receive news like the news above, we wonder and cry out to God, "isn't our faith great enough? This isn't what we desired!"
This story always brings me hope, but now my heart grieves. Rosemary, Dave and their daughters won't lose faith today because of this news. They will struggle to make sense of it and discern next steps. As for me, I'll remember what I've always believed, God answers prayers in ways that only God understands. Our minds cannot grasp the concept of the ways in which God works. All we can really do is know that God's intentions for us are greater than we have the capability to understand.
Lord, in your mercy... hear our prayers.
. . . dave, the selfless . . .
This morning around 7:10 am I was admitted to pre-op along with Rosemary and her girls to see her husband Dave who was preparing for surgery to remove cancer from his pancreas.
Dave is 72 years old, and one of the kindest and encouraging people I've ever met.
I remember the day I met Dave. I was taking a lunch break in our church lobby and he walked in. He didn't walk up to me or indicate that he wanted to talk. However, I looked up at him and said something along the lines of, "have you ever read something so intuitive that it convinced you of something you really need to do?" He then sat down and we talked through the idea of older Christians mentoring new Christians (and not based on age). He shared with me how successful teachers are when they are mentored.
I wouldn't say that Dave and I are besties, but he is somebody that inspires me... like a good Elementary School principal should. And his wife Rosemary is a beautiful soul who has shared her own adoption story and her heart for orphans.
When I saw the post on Facebook that Dave has pancreatic cancer, my heart sunk. The first thing I knew to offer was a prayer circle. Now, nearly a month after his diagnosis I arose early to pray with him and his family before surgery.
When I arrived, their daughter Cortney ushered me to where Rosemary and her sister Amy were hanging out in the waiting room. Normally I can be pretty stoic during these times, but I couldn't even say hello. If words came out, they would have been followed by tears - possibly sobbing. Instead, I hugged Rosemary and took a deep breath. I will always remember Rev. Karen Lampe's words that pastors are supposed to be the strong ones, we must remain in control of our emotions during tough times. I can't help being an emotional being, but I understand why. They have probably shed enough tears that they don't need the pastor crying too. So I sucked it up and put on my big girl pants.
Within 10 minutes we were led back to the pre-op room to see Dave. I know Dave to be a strong man, and to see him in such a vulnerable position was almost too overwhelming. Again, big girl pants.
After the anesthesiologist finished his talk with Dave we were allowed to surround Dave. I took my place on his right and told him how the entire church was acting as his prayer angels, not warriors. I never have understood why we go to battle with prayer. We are praying to God, it connects us to God. It is not a battle at all.
I asked Dave if he had any Scripture he wanted to be read and he said any would do which was good because I had one picked for him. Revelation 21:1-5.
"Behold I am doing a new thing!"
After, I anointed his head with oil, and we held hands and prayed.
Before leaving I told Dave I couldn't understand why he would be proud of me for coming. He had left me that comment on a post I made last night telling him I was praying hard. I told him I was the proud one to have the honor to see him before surgery, and that his courage and faithfulness are inspiring. He then turned it on me to tell me how much he thinks I'm an excellent minister, and that he and Rose Mary love hearing me pray. Even with anxiousness written on his face, he was still the encouraging person I've known him to be.
This is the kind of person Dave is - always putting others first.
As we turned to leave and as they were preparing to start an epidural, he told Rosemary, if you get to come back before surgery, don't be afraid. I'm going to have tubes in my neck and arms. It'll look scary, but don't be afraid.
Don't be afraid. That's who Dave is - always looking out for others.
I am so fortunate to know this man.
Dave is 72 years old, and one of the kindest and encouraging people I've ever met.
I remember the day I met Dave. I was taking a lunch break in our church lobby and he walked in. He didn't walk up to me or indicate that he wanted to talk. However, I looked up at him and said something along the lines of, "have you ever read something so intuitive that it convinced you of something you really need to do?" He then sat down and we talked through the idea of older Christians mentoring new Christians (and not based on age). He shared with me how successful teachers are when they are mentored.
I wouldn't say that Dave and I are besties, but he is somebody that inspires me... like a good Elementary School principal should. And his wife Rosemary is a beautiful soul who has shared her own adoption story and her heart for orphans.
When I saw the post on Facebook that Dave has pancreatic cancer, my heart sunk. The first thing I knew to offer was a prayer circle. Now, nearly a month after his diagnosis I arose early to pray with him and his family before surgery.
When I arrived, their daughter Cortney ushered me to where Rosemary and her sister Amy were hanging out in the waiting room. Normally I can be pretty stoic during these times, but I couldn't even say hello. If words came out, they would have been followed by tears - possibly sobbing. Instead, I hugged Rosemary and took a deep breath. I will always remember Rev. Karen Lampe's words that pastors are supposed to be the strong ones, we must remain in control of our emotions during tough times. I can't help being an emotional being, but I understand why. They have probably shed enough tears that they don't need the pastor crying too. So I sucked it up and put on my big girl pants.
Within 10 minutes we were led back to the pre-op room to see Dave. I know Dave to be a strong man, and to see him in such a vulnerable position was almost too overwhelming. Again, big girl pants.
After the anesthesiologist finished his talk with Dave we were allowed to surround Dave. I took my place on his right and told him how the entire church was acting as his prayer angels, not warriors. I never have understood why we go to battle with prayer. We are praying to God, it connects us to God. It is not a battle at all.
I asked Dave if he had any Scripture he wanted to be read and he said any would do which was good because I had one picked for him. Revelation 21:1-5.
"Behold I am doing a new thing!"
After, I anointed his head with oil, and we held hands and prayed.
Before leaving I told Dave I couldn't understand why he would be proud of me for coming. He had left me that comment on a post I made last night telling him I was praying hard. I told him I was the proud one to have the honor to see him before surgery, and that his courage and faithfulness are inspiring. He then turned it on me to tell me how much he thinks I'm an excellent minister, and that he and Rose Mary love hearing me pray. Even with anxiousness written on his face, he was still the encouraging person I've known him to be.
This is the kind of person Dave is - always putting others first.
As we turned to leave and as they were preparing to start an epidural, he told Rosemary, if you get to come back before surgery, don't be afraid. I'm going to have tubes in my neck and arms. It'll look scary, but don't be afraid.
Don't be afraid. That's who Dave is - always looking out for others.
I am so fortunate to know this man.
Thursday, February 7, 2019
...gaslighting and local politics...
As a pastor, Raytown is my "mission field." What that means is that I am in ministry for the city of Raytown, Missouri. Whether you choose to be Christian or not - one of my priorities is to offer care. I can be #FORraytown all day every day, but as I’ve seen anger rising in social media threads, I feel I need to address it. Take it as you will, and scroll on past if you disagree.
More than anything, I care for you all. Obviously, I can’t sit down with each person and develop a relationship, but I do care.
I want to preface this by saying that I am NOT a psychologist. All of these opinions are my own.
With the Mayoral race in front of us (I will never tell you who to vote for or insinuate who you should vote for) emotions are high. I have seen the term “gaslighting” come up. I’ve even used the term in one-on-one conversations. Since I'm stuck at home today, I thought I'd write out my thoughts on the topic of gaslight. I'll even reference from Psychology Today and other sources.
1. What is gaslighting:
One individual by projective identification attempts to cause another individual to doubt his/her own judgments and perceptions. The basic pattern of the “double whammy” includes a verbal attack on the victim; the victim's response; and a gaslighting intervention in which the victimizer attacks the victim's judgments, perception, or reality-testing.
In English now: when one person causes another to doubt him or herself.
2. How does gaslighting work in personal relationships?
Gaslighting is a form of persistent manipulation and brainwashing that causes the victim to doubt her or himself, and ultimately lose her or his own sense of perception, identity, and self-worth.
3. Does gaslighting happen to large groups of people in the public sphere?
a. yes, just read this. Dictators are experts.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/are-gaslighters-aware-what-they-do
4. How does one effectively gaslight?
a. When one person claims something with such an apparent intensity of conviction that the other person begins to doubt their own perspective.
b. Vigorous and unwavering denial coupled with a display of righteous indignation can accomplish the same task.
c. Bringing up historical facts that seem largely accurate but contain minute, hard-to-prove distortions and using them to “prove” the correctness of one’s position is another method. (I’ve heard this called the Straw Man Theory as well)
d. Gaslighting is particularly effective when coupled with other tactics such as shaming and guilting.
5. Do gaslighters know they are doing it?
a. I’m convinced that many have no idea they do it - and there is really no malicious intent. I think by nature we want things done in a certain way. Some of us resort to thinking that everyone must think like us and will do what we need to do to get people on our side. One of the things I personally have noticed about gaslighters who are unaware they are doing it is when they don’t answer questions directly, or they answer a portion of a question.
Some gaslighters have learned how to do it and use the tactic to manipulate. In the article below, the author talks about the book 48 Laws of Power, which I have read. It’s all about getting people to do what you want, but in a way that creates positive results. I think gaslighters are after results that benefit them only. So, say someone wants you to be fired at your job, they will use the tactics for negative results.
Even if they are unaware they are doing it or not, it’s a problem.
6. How do I stop a gas lighter?
a. Quite simply, you probably can’t. Most of the articles I have read are about personal relationships, but the tactics work the same. Here are the tactics I have used
- Don’t engage or confront, remove yourself from the situation. If you think you’re being gaslit on social media, don’t respond any further, or say that the conversation is over. I once had to tell a co-worker to stop talking to me for my own sanity.
- Ask a trusted friend for their perspective. If you have things in writing, even better!
www.preventabusiverelationships.com/articles/gas_lighting_215.php
Articles for further reading:
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