I had a lot of patience when I worked there and I tried to re-iterate it to everyone I worked with. One day, one of the management team members lost his cool and I could see the fury in his face as he was about to unload on a lowly base-rate. (that's what we called the first year kids or anybody that wasn't a supervisor) I ran up to him and said, "hey, remember...patience is a virtue." He pushed me out of the way, and said, "it's not when you want something done right!" And he continued with his mission of reaming this kids derriere. YIKES!!! I continued that attitude during my entire career at Worlds of Fun and it worked fairly well for me. However, it was towards the end of my fourth year, when things started to unwind. I lost my patience with people and my ability to keep my cool diminished. I would yell at my Supervisors for taking advantage of me, or my co-workers for not seeing things the way I did. I don't know how I made the transition from passive to reactive, but I did and in the years since I ended my employment from Worlds of Fun in 2002, I have gone through cycles of passiveness to aggressiveness.
Last year was pretty tumultuous for me and I decided that ending the cycle had to happen. I am proud to say that since February 27th, 2009, I haven't resorted to my aggression, but I also haven't let people walk all over me. My transition into aggression has always been brought on by my eventual irritation with my passivity. To be honest though, there was one day a few weeks ago that I let my anger out on one of my employees because he wasn't doing what I wanted him to do. I apologized because Christi was right, I was in the wrong. I don't think I expect too much, I just think I expect things to be done how I do them. I have no control over others. I have to let others find their own way of doing things and then give them the time and the chance to do it.
I woke up on February 28th, cried to Ashley about my disappointment then got out of bed and decided to actually listen to the words she told me. I went out that evening, met new people and haven't looked back. I've been taking life in stride and the things that I've wanted have started to materialize for me. I'm doing so much photography and graphic design that I always have a little cash on me. I've kept a positive attitude about everything. I'm being patient about getting what I want. The one thing I want the most hasn't happened yet, but I'm positive it will. Sometimes perseverance and assiduousness cannot be forced and must be done subtly. One cannot do things tenaciously and expect immediate results. Especially if the result comes from others. I will wait patiently for the things that I want to happen in my life, some will happen faster than others, but the goal is to achieve what you want. And sometimes patience is the only virtue that will get you to that point.
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